How to Nurture Your Child’s Curiosity

Does your child ask you question after question? Learn why constant questions are actually good, and what you can do to nurture curiosity.

“What is time?”

“Why is an orange a circle?”

“How do people love each other when they’re apart?”

You may not know how to explain the way humans came to be or why life even started on earth. Other times, your child’s constant questions seem a bit silly or nonsensical. And answering these questions can be more difficult when you’re busy and over-scheduled as it is.

Instead, we end up discussing things that “make sense.” How she did on her math worksheet, what she wants to eat for dinner, and where she put her toys. You know, “real life” stuff.

How to nurture your child’s curiosity

But if you find yourself a bit bombarded with your child’s constant questions and fascination with new ideas, consider this:

These are the very questions that many philosophers and academics ask. People have written books and journals about time, botany, and love, but we certainly don’t roll our eyes at them.

It’s easy to forget how much we don’t know. We’re adults—we think we’ve gone through enough to survive life and get the basics. Somewhere along the line, we stopped asking lots of questions and settled for what we know.

We leave the abstract and profound to other minds, and see philosophy as a luxury career, one left for experts to sort. But here are our young children wondering about these mysteries, determined to make sense of our world.

Unfortunately, some of our typical reactions when they ask open-ended questions include:

• getting annoyed
• not taking their questions seriously
• rushing through an answer
• not encouraging further thought
• judging their questions

The result? They stop asking philosophical and worldly questions, usually around the elementary school years.

Part of that is likely because they’re older. With age, they have a better understanding (or at least acceptance) of the world. They don’t need to know exactly how high the clouds are, only that they’re high. They’ve adjusted and are better acclimated in ways their younger selves didn’t.

But they also stop asking because they’ve learned about “good” and “bad” questions. We respond to some questions while brushing others off. Some questions we praise with “Great question!” and others we laugh about or fail to acknowledge. We’re not alone, either—their peers, teachers, and family might do the same.

So, how can we nurture their love of learning and critical thinking, even as they grow up?

1. Respect the questions

Do you respect your children’s questions? You may not mean to, but certain questions may elicit strange looks or reactions from you. Maybe household stress or work don’t give you the time or patience to answer them.

I’ll be the first to admit that I still have to catch myself in how I respond to my kids’ questions, no matter how bizarre or nonsensical they might be. They’ve asked questions in all earnest about things that seemed like odd questions to ask.

But if we look at the question, we realize how deep and inquisitive children truly can be at this young age.

Respect your child’s question the next time he asks. Don’t brush it off or give fluff answers to keep him quiet. Give it your best shot to answer questions, and suggest looking up an answer if you don’t know (yay, internet!). And make him feel like he can ask questions without judgment.

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2. Don’t say “good question”

Sometimes I can’t stop myself from saying “good,” from “Good job!” to “Great question!”

On the surface, praising your child’s question as “good” makes sense: you want her to feel good for asking, and praise her for being so inquisitive.

But here’s the problem with labeling a question as “good”: You’re adding unnecessary judgment.

When we think about judgment, we imagine negative comments. But judgment also applies to positive phrases and enthusiasm, including calling something a “good question.”

Why? We’re implying that these certain questions are the ones they should keep asking. And that if there are “good” questions, then there must be “bad” ones to avoid as well.

Instead, honor all questions, whether strange or magnificent, silly or profound. If something catches you off-guard, encourage conversation and say, “That’s interesting.” Ask her what she thinks.

In treating all questions as valid, you’re encouraging her to keep asking, all without making her wonder if it’s worth asking or not.

3. Admit your own curiosity

“How do bees make honey?” my son asked me one day.

“You know, I have no idea,” I replied. “When we get home, let’s look it up and see how they do that.”

How bees make honey is just one of the many questions I had no idea how to answer (now I do after looking it up!). I don’t exactly know how many moons each planet has, and only know a handful of our states’ capitals.

The thing is, we don’t know all the answers, and we do a dishonesty to our kids in making it seem like we do.

Instead, they should see us stumped or curious about the same questions they wonder about. They’ll feel better knowing these are questions you’re willing to ask and learn about as well.

And most importantly, they’ll know that learning is a never-ending practice. We don’t reach a particular age or graduate from school having learned everything. For lifelong learners, there are always new discoveries to question and learn about, even as an adult.

Conclusion

Encourage exploration and awe in your little philosopher. These are all valid questions each of us as curious children have wondered about, yet stopped asking when we grew up.

And your child will grow up. She may stop asking the same questions she did in her early childhood. She may have learned exactly why the clouds are as high as they are or have a better grasp of how time works.

But a child with a curious mind will be an adult dissatisfied with complacency. She’ll develop creativity and problem-solving skills throughout her life.

After all, asking these questions have led to some of the world’s best inventions, cures, theories, new experiences, and solutions. Don’t hold her back from these aspirations. Instead, encourage her natural curiosity, no matter how many questions she asks.

Get more tips:

• Homework Tips for Parents: Crucial Mistakes You Should Definitely Avoid
• How to Keep Your Child Learning in the Summer
• What Every Kindergartener Should Know by the End of the Year
• 8 Long Term Benefits of Reading to Your Child
• How to Raise a Bright Child

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