How to Get an Overtired Toddler to Sleep

Does your child continue to fight naps and bedtime? Learn how to get an overtired toddler to sleep and go back to your normal schedule.

how to get an overtired toddler to sleep

New teeth, transitioning to fewer naps, hectic family festivities… I’ve had my fair share of dealing with an overtired child. Sometimes my boys would outright skip naps or would only take one for 30 minutes, despite needing a lot more sleep than that. Life events prevented regular naps or their usual bedtime routine, which only made them resist even more (or wake up throughout the night).

With bags under their eyes, I didn’t want their sleep problems to worsen or their post-wake-up tantrums to be the norm. So, I dug around for advice on how to get back on schedule and have a good night’s sleep.

Thankfully I picked up a few effective tips to turn an overtired toddler into a good sleeper again. I’m confident they can do the same for you:

Have your toddler take an earlier nap

Let’s say you decided to keep your toddler in bed despite his early wake-up time. While he did stay in bed, he also didn’t fall back asleep. Even though you officially got him up at 6:30am, he’s technically been awake and alert since 5am.

So, instead of napping at his usual midday nap, move his nap much earlier. That way, he doesn’t get even more overtired come nap time, which could prevent him from having a restful sleep.

Let’s say he typically naps 12-2pm—see if he can take a nap starting at 10:30 or 11am. While the clock says it’s not nap time yet, his body might be itching for sleep even at that early hour.

Then, if he happens to sleep past his typical two hours, let him rest and catch up on those lost hours. If he started napping at 10:30am, don’t feel compelled to wake him up at 12:30pm. Instead, let him wake up on his own. After all, he still has plenty of time between his nap and bedtime to be awake.

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Have your toddler take a later nap

Let’s say your toddler wakes up on time in the morning but fights her nap all the time. She takes forever to fall asleep, skips the nap entirely, or throws a fit at the mere mention of nap time.

If she consistently refuses to nap, it could simply be about timing. In other words, she may not feel tired enough come nap time.

What to do? Experiment with pushing nap time back, even little by little, especially if she tends to wake up just fine in the mornings. If she usually naps 11am-1pm, see what an 11:30am nap can do. If she still doesn’t seem the least bit sleepy, try 12pm.

Sometimes a toddler who refuses to sleep isn’t tired enough. By pushing nap time back, you’re giving her plenty of time to play, priming her for a good midday rest.

Have a really early bedtime

You might’ve heard the advice to have an early bedtime as a way to accommodate your toddler’s recent lack of sleep. But “early bedtime” for many parents might mean 7:30pm instead of 8pm, only to find their toddler just as resistant to sleep.

If a slightly earlier bedtime hasn’t worked, try a really early bedtime… as in hours before he normally sleeps.

If he usually sleeps at 7:30pm, try putting him to bed at 5:30pm tonight. This is especially useful if he skipped his nap or had a short one. A ridiculously early bedtime can be what he needs to “reset” his sleep patterns and catch up on lost hours.

Set an “official” wake-up time

Do your toddler’s cries determine wake-up time? Maybe he wakes up earlier than you’re ready or willing to start the day, or the length of his naps depends on how long he can sleep before he wakes up cranky.

Except there’s a problem: he could still use more sleep but isn’t given the chance to.

Instead of ending his nap or starting the day the minute he wakes up, set official times for him to do so. Don’t start your day at 5:07am because he woke up crying. Walk into the room, make sure everything is fine, and calmly let him know that it’s not wake-up time yet.

The same is true for naps. If he woke up crying from a nap after a mere 30 minutes when you were hoping for an hour, briefly enter the room to let him know nap time isn’t over and that he still has 30 more minutes to try to sleep.

As I say in my book, No Cranky Naps:

“Resist the urge to barge in the minute you hear your child whimper or cry. As much as it feels like you’re supposed to end nap time at the first sound of a cry, holding off—even for just a few minutes—has its benefits.”

Whether during naps, the early morning, or the middle of the night, continue to check in every few minutes to gently let him know it’s time to keep sleeping. Tuck him back in and turn on a white noise machine to help him go back to sleep.

Many parents get discouraged when they try this and find that their toddler still wakes up at night and doesn’t go back to sleep. Remember, he’s still not used to this arrangement and might fuss and cry about it for a few days.

But over time, he learns that you mean your word when you say nap time isn’t over and that he can’t get out of bed yet. He realizes that this can be his quiet time to play with a toy while he waits for you or that he can even fall back asleep. He won’t learn to wait, much less sleep, when you get him up the minute he fusses.

Keep your day calm

It’s no surprise that an overtired toddler usually gets that way from back-to-back festivities and outings. Even a day packed with errands and extracurricular activities can take a toll. While special occasions like these are just that—special (and often unavoidable)—try to keep your days calm and low-key otherwise.

For instance, if your toddler has been struggling with sleep and adjusting to a new schedule, try to keep him home most of the day. Save errands for when he’s at daycare or at night, and turn down (or cut short) an outing if needed.

Kids need a surprisingly large amount of downtime to simply tinker at home, especially when they’re already overtired as it is.

Final thoughts

Dealing with an overtired toddler is enough to make any parent lose her patience. Hopefully, with these tips, you can find a way to get your little one back on track and end the sleep deprivation.

No more sleep issues, friend! You can get your overtired toddler back on track and get enough sleep—even with new teeth or hectic family activities.

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2 Comments

  1. What do I do if my toddler is in daycare 8:30-5 and doesn’t nap there and is waking up very early and cranky, before 5am? We can’t move his nap up there and his mood just gets worse throughout the week.

    1. Nina Garcia says:

      Hi Mir! Is there a chance that you can ask the daycare to try to put him down for an earlier nap? He might not be napping at daycare because he’s already overtired by the time they try to put him down. That can help him reset his sleep and prevent him from getting oertired.