What to Do When Your Toddler Wakes Up Crying from Naps

Struggling when your toddler wakes up crying from naps? In this article, we’ll discuss why this happens and more importantly, what you can do to turn things around!

My toddler had never been a great napper and often fought going to sleep. When he did nap, he’d wake up cranky, whining and crying for up to an hour.

As a first-time mom, I never even knew kids could wake up any other way. I figured every toddler cried when they woke up, just as babies do. That is, until I met another mom who said her son would sit in his crib after waking up from a nap, smiling and waiting for her.

After hearing that bit of news, I got curious as to why my son woke up crying after naps whereas others don’t.

Thankfully, I found that certain strategies helped ease the transition between taking a nap and waking up from one. No longer do you have to look forward to the day your toddler stops napping altogether for this to be over.

First, we’ll talk about ways to wake him up to prevent his tears. Then, I’ll share what to do if he wakes up crying from a nap:

How to prevent your toddler from crying after a nap

Wake your toddler up in stages

What?! Wake her up? you might think. After all, nap time is when you get a break in the day. If your toddler barely naps as it is, waking her up seems preposterous.

Except I’ve found that gently waking her up—before she wakes herself—can drastically reduce the tears.

It’s not just about turning on the lights and saying, “Wake up time!” Instead, wake her up in stages, going in and out of the room to let her stir on her own. Let her wake up slowly and keep everything mellow.

For instance, open the door to the room and rub her back, just enough to barely wake her up, before leaving the room. A few minutes later, go back and turn off the white noise, then leave the room again.

Keep going back every few minutes, changing one aspect of the room or gently waking her up, so that she has more time to adjust to being awake.

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Lie down with your toddler

Similarly, you can also wake your toddler up, but this time, continue to lie down with him.

Instead of changing parts of the room, simply lie down and hold him as he sleeps. You can help him wake up by rubbing his back, ruffling his hair, giving him a kiss… anything to let him slowly wake up while realizing that you’re right next to him.

One of my twins would wake up cranky even after a three-hour nap, but not when he knew I was right next to him.

Now, this is of course easier if your toddler sleeps in a twin bed than a crib. But even then, you can lift him and sit in a rocking chair, the couch, or the floor (for instance, on a bean bag or pile of pillows) so he can slowly wake up in your arms.

Set an alarm to music

Music can be an effective way to wake your toddler up and prevent post-nap crying. Set an alarm to play soothing, soft music at a certain time to gently rouse her from sleep.

Then, set your alarm about 10 minutes after the music starts to come into her room. This way, she’s had a few minutes to stir between sleep and wake time, ready for you to wake her up.

So, what happens if he wakes up long before you’re even able to wake him up yourself? Or you do try to gently rouse him, only for him to still throw a fit?

Let’s now talk about what to do when he wakes up crying from naps, despite your best efforts, starting with incentives.

What to do if your toddler wakes up crying from a nap

Give an incentive

Give your toddler a simple incentive to wake up calmly by reminding him what he can look forward to now that he’s awake. Yes, allow him to feel his feelings—don’t “distract” him away from them. But remind him of what he can do now that he’s awake.

For instance, let him know that his favorite snack is ready on the dining table or that it’s time to go to swim class. That way, he focuses less on the misery of waking up from his nap and more on the things and events he can look forward to.

Cuddle on the couch

A change of scenery—and having you nearby—can be all your toddler needs to stop being miserable after a nap. If she wakes up upset, carry her to the couch (or your bed or living room) and simply hold her as she cries.

Yes, it’s tough to listen to her crying, especially when it feels like you do this day in and day out. But a few minutes of cuddling on the couch as she releases her tears can be all she needs to stop. And besides, 20 minutes of crying and cuddling on the couch beats an hour of losing your temper and hearing even more tears.

Offer a snack and drink

I’ve mentioned snacks a few times now, and for good reason. Sometimes, the only thing that would snap my kids out of their post-nap tears was food.

You can even combine snacks and drinks with other strategies. Offer a sippy cup of milk while you cuddle on the couch or remind him that his snacks are waiting for him in the kitchen. After all, he may have gone a long time before his last meal—he could be genuinely hungry from having been asleep this whole time.

Prepare his snack and milk as soon as he’s down for a nap so they’re ready to go no matter what time he happens to wake up. And combine drinking milk with reading books in bed. This combination worked nearly all the time with my eldest to calm him down.

Don’t get your toddler up just yet

What happens if your toddler wakes up crying from naps when she’s barely been down at all? One of my kids could never seem to nap longer than 30-45 minutes—I’d often be shocked on those rare days when he’d cross the hour mark.

If you’d like to lengthen your toddler’s naps—or if she woke up prematurely from her usual lengthy one—don’t get her up just yet.

Rather than ending nap time the minute she wakes up and cries, end it when you say so. Set a predetermined time as the “official” wake up time. Then, don’t get her up any earlier than that.

Let’s say you want her to nap for an hour, but she wakes up crying within 30 minutes. Calmly go into her room and let her know it’s still time to sleep, not get out of bed just yet. Then, if she’s still crying 15 minutes later, go into her room once more and remind her the same thing.

Only once those 30 minutes have passed do you then get her out of bed and ready for the day.

Now, will she fall back asleep within those 30 minutes? More than likely, no. But over time, she’ll learn that waking up early from a nap doesn’t mean it’s time to get the rest of the afternoon started just yet. Instead, she’ll learn to wait quietly in bed—and yes, maybe even go back to sleep—until you come get her up.

Toddler Keeps Getting Out of Bed

Conclusion

Your toddler doesn’t have to wake up crying from naps any longer, friend! You now have the tips to prevent these tears from happening as much as possible as well as what to do should they still happen.

Perhaps she can sit in the crib after waking up from a nap, smiling and waiting for you to come get her.

Frequently asked questions

Why does my toddler wake up crying from naps?

The most common reason is simply the lack of sleep. If your toddler naps for a measly 30-45 minutes the entire day, waking up can make for one cranky wake up.

Even with enough sleep, naps can leave us feeling disoriented and “out of it,” our toddlers included. The confusion can be enough to make your toddler cry and fuss.

Just like the rest of us, a nightmare during naps can make for an equally bad wake up. And of course, good ol’ hunger. Your toddler might not cry for food, but the discomfort of an empty stomach can make her just as cranky.

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2 Comments

  1. Resheidat says:

    It definitely is a relief to know many toddlers wake up from their naps crying.
    My almost 4 year old boy does not nap during the day, but he falls asleep on the way home from kindergarten. The drive home is less than 20 mins so we stay in the car after we arrive for 10 to 15 minutes to allow him more time to sleep. The problem is that when we take him off the car, he would start crying hysterically and would not stop not matter what we do ( cuddling, incentives, snacks,…you name it)
    Sometimes , and after a long and stressful day at work, I just can’t tolerate these tantrums and end up crying as well!!!
    After 1 or 2 hours of on and off tantrums, he would be all happy and as if nothing had happened!
    How normal is that?!

    1. Nina Garcia says:

      I totally know what you mean about the sudden turnaround to being happy even after a tantrum lol.

      One thing that worked well for us during those car ride homes is to keep them awake during the ride, so that when you get home, they can take a longer nap then. Then when you get home, you can put him down for a nap, where he’ll hopefully sleep longer. You might even want to prepare his room so that everything is already ready when you get home (like drawing the curtains, having toys out of the way, his bed made, etc).

      I hope that helps!