You Know You’re a Twin Mom When…

Being a mom of twins is no easy task! Take a look at things only a twin mom would understand, from a twin pregnancy to managing two toddlers.

twin mom“I have good news…” my doctor began during my first ultrasound. “…and even better news: you’re having twins!”

As difficult as the first seven weeks of my pregnancy had been, I never thought it was because I was carrying two. I figured it was because it was my second pregnancy, or maybe I was carrying a girl this time.

But the minute she said those words, I was thrust into life with twins. Suddenly I wasn’t a “regular” mom, nor would I have the typical family with two kiddos. Nope—I now belonged to the twin world.

Twin moms share knowing glances, well aware of things no one but moms of multiples can relate to. We use lingo I had never heard before, despite researching and reading everything about pregnancies and babies. And we shake our heads each time we think about something that only a twin mom would understand.

Take a look at a few of my moments, as well as other twin parents I’ve asked when we realized these things only happen when you’re a twin mom:

1. Your insurance thinks you applied for the same child twice

You not only have to care for two newborns, but you also have to deal with “real world” stuff like making sure your twins are covered under your insurance. Not exactly a pleasant experience, especially when they deny your claim because they thought you claimed the same child twice.

Sure, it’s understandable. Same last names, same addresses, and same birthdays. Except for the first and middle names, I could see why they thought they were the same person.

Free chapter: Are you struggling with getting your twins to sleep through the night? How to Sleep Train Twins can help! Join my newsletter and grab a preview chapter below—at no cost to you:

How to Sleep Train Twins

2. You think singleton moms have it easy

When my eldest was born, I asked my mom to stay with us for a few weeks, thinking we needed all the help we could get. And at that time, it sure felt that way: I thought I needed all three adults (me, my husband, and my mom) to manage one newborn.

Then a few years later, I asked her to stay with us again, this time to help with not just my eldest, but two babies. After that experience, I had no idea what I was complaining about when I only had one newborn to three adults.

See surprising differences between singleton and twin pregnancies.

Differences Between Singleton and Twin Pregnancies

3. You know what “singleton” means (and use it all the time)

I never even knew I was a singleton mom with my eldest until I became a twin mom. Now I use the word “singleton” all the time, whether to compare my singleton pregnancy or to differentiate a singleton’s needs from those of a twin’s.

Besides singleton, you also know what didi, modi, and momo mean (and what each one stands for).

4. You need the double stroller just to get to the front door

You could easily carry one baby to get around just about anywhere, but what do you do when you have two?

Rely on the double stroller, of course.

As a twin mom, you likely use that stroller for almost everything, not just on long walks or errands. You probably use it even to get the twins from your car to the front door (because there’s no way to carry two babies—or even two infant car seats—if you’re on your own).

5. You get the funniest questions about whether they’re identical or not

I chuckle each time I get a question that could only come from someone who doesn’t know anything about twins (like I was before I had mine!). And I know I’m not alone—fellow twin moms have reported similar funny questions like:

  • “Are they identical?” (when asking about a boy/girl pair)
  • “Are they natural?” (it’s strange to ask how they were conceived in the first place)
  • “Is it ‘fraternal twins’ and ‘maternal twins’?” (nope—it’s “fraternal” or “identical”)

See more interesting facts about twins you might not know.

Facts about Twins

6. People ask you if twins run in your family

Having twins can run in the family, but only in certain circumstances.

For instance, having identical twins is not genetic. And while fraternal twins can be genetic, it’s only through the mother’s side. (A woman may have a predisposition to release two eggs instead of one.)

Even then, genetics don’t always play a role, as older age and in vitro fertilization are also contributing factors.

When people ask me this question, I don’t bother explaining any of this. I just say, “Well, they’re the fifth pair of twins in my husband’s family” (true!).

7. You pack the same lunches (or serve the same meals)

I don’t match my twins for everything, but somehow, they figured that they should have the same thing as each other. If their older brother has a different meal, no biggie. But heaven forbid I give one twin a sandwich while the other has pasta.

So, now I make sure I have two of everything when packing lunches or snacks. They don’t have to be the same (it could be different-colored water bottles, for instance) so long as they’re the same type.

8. You get a pass on a lot of things

Whether you’re a mom of twins or not, everyone knows having twins is hard. So, we get a pass on just about everything.

I didn’t (and eventually couldn’t) exercise during my twin pregnancy the way I did with my singleton one. I couldn’t rely on newborn sleep cues or feed on demand because I had to put them on the same schedule.

And you’re pretty much allowed to leave any event without saying goodbye because everyone knows you have toddler twins throwing a fit.

Just found out you’re having twins? Here’s what to do next.

Having Twins

Conclusion

I never thought in all my life that I’d be a twin mom, but now I can’t imagine it any other way. Life with twins is different, and one that few people can relate to. As with many things, we bond with and understand others who’ve gone through the same experiences, and having twins is no exception.

Sometimes we simply need that knowing glance and the inside joke to remind us that we’re not alone. That someone, somewhere, is also learning what “singleton” means for the first time.

Get more tips:

Don’t forget: Join my newsletter and get a preview chapter of How to Sleep Train Twins below—at no cost to you:

How to Sleep Train Twins

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.