Moms, we do a lot of things, some of them not even necessary. Sure, we balance work and home. We hold our kids sleep-deprived when they’re sick and dripping with snot. We’re supermom as we cook, clean and clip fingernails. All while maintaining our roles as wives, friends, daughters and sisters.
Then… we do even more. Look at any Pinterest board. Log onto Facebook and scroll through your fellow moms’ posts. Read your favorite mom bloggers and look at their pictures. These are awesome—in moderation.
7 supermom things I don’t do
Me? I don’t do them all. Below are seven supermom things I don’t regularly do.
#1: Decorate for the holidays (besides the holidays).
Halloween, fall, Easter… You’d never know the seasons were upon us if you looked inside my home. You won’t find cornucopia centerpieces or glass vases with pine cones in fall season.
Instead I’ll do the Christmas thing. We’ll buy a fresh tree and decorate with ornaments, lights and ribbons. Next year, I’ll even get stockings to hang.
But the other seasons? Our home looks the same the other 11 months of the year.
#2: Take professional photos.
I have yet to pack up my family in our finest (and matching) clothes and have our photo taken. Not even for the holidays and the obligatory holiday cards (another thing I don’t do).
To vilify me further, I have only taken one complete family photo of ourselves. Back when I had more time with just one child, I managed to have photos taken of the three of us. But now with two extra little ones, we have one impromptu shot of the five of us after a hike.
And don’t even mention the milestone photos. I don’t do monthly photos for the first year and professional photos every year.
So remember me the next time you feel bad for not taking professional family photos. There’s at least one family out there who has yet to take them either.
#3: Throw DIY kids birthday parties (with a themed dessert bar).
For years, I’d browse Pinterest and pin cute photos of party themes and decoration. Then I finally admitted probably never do any of them.
Our “themes” include buying matching party supplies and maybe throwing in some balloons. As cute as dessert bars are, I don’t think they’re necessary. (Do guests really need that many options for dessert?) And I’ve done away with printables after my five-year-old’s first birthday party.
Even this past year’s parties have been a bit stressful for me. Next time I’m going 100% hands off and forking the money to host them at an outside venue.
Okay, so I don’t give myself enough credit for this. Sometimes I’ll gather some vinegar, baking soda and food coloring for a science experiment. But that’s the thing… I don’t do them regularly enough.
Like DIY party ideas, I’d pin crafts and activities only to find I hardly get a chance (or the motivation) to do them. Plus, many of the crafts look like the parents did most of the work and the kids just enjoyed the fruits of their labor. Nothing wrong with that if parents like turning cardboard boxes into drive-through cars. Personally, I don’t—hence the lack of crafts in our home.
My alternative? I stock my kids with plenty of open-ended toys. Paints, crayons, paper, string, glue and all that good stuff—I let them go to town with it. Meanwhile, I do my best to find cool experiments and crafts, but don’t beat myself up if I don’t.
#5: Record my kids’ milestones.
I record all my kids’ milestones… in my head. I have a baby book somewhere for my eldest (that I have yet to finish, five years later). But otherwise I don’t record their milestones.
I know when they each walked, talked, crawled and all that, but don’t mark them down. At one point I saved their first strands of hair in an envelope that’s sitting I presume in a drawer somewhere. I may have photos of their first taste of solid food but they’re shuffled in my computer.
Like most parents, I was much better about this with my eldest, when I had more time and zeal to record milestones. I also fell for the supermom syndrome and felt I had to do it. Chalk it up to second- (and third-) child syndrome, but I don’t do as much now that I have three of them to look after.
#6: Complete bucket lists.
Have you seen those huge posters with activities planned for the summer? They’re a great resource for when you need ideas on what to do those long stretches without school. I’ve even gathered many ideas from them. But to try and do every one of them? Not for me. I like having a list of ideas but would rather not have the pressure of doing them all.
Of all the items on the list, this is the one I should do the most. And once in a while, I will. I’ll get hyped up about running and buy socks and have my workout gear ready to go… for about a week. Then later, I’ll psyche myself up to exercise to dance videos before calling that quits, too.
My biggest excuse? Lack of time. I know, I know. If it were really important, I would make the time for it. Who knows—hopefully I can cross this one off my list of things I don’t do soon.
What I do do…
I’m really not that horrible, I promise. I’m a supermom in my own way. Below are some examples of things I actually do—every day—to make up for the above seven:
- I prepare home-cooked meals. And I’m not talking thawing frozen food in the skillet or mixing marinara with pre-made tortellini. From scratch, people!
- I read to my kids. We’ve incorporated reading into their routine so well that it goes without question. These kids get some serious book exposure.
- My five-year-old does “homework.” Every night, my eldest does a worksheet, on weekends and everything. Bonus points for me: He actually thinks it’s fun.
- I prepared homemade baby food. All three kids are now on regular table food, but when they were younger, I pureed their baby food.
- I parent mindfully. Reading all those parenting books and research has done some good: I’m pretty proud of the way I parent my kids with the full knowledge and humility that I still have a ways to go.
We’ve all fallen for the supermom syndrome. We feel guilty or pressured to do what moms should do. Guess what? You’re doing fantastic and meeting the needs of your children. Pinterest-worthy craft or not.
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Tell me in the comments: Do you feel like an overworked supermom? I’m sure I’m not the only mom who doesn’t do everything supermoms should. What supermom things do you do and not do?
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