4 Year Old Waking Up Early All of a Sudden? Here's What to Do

Is your 4 year old waking up early all of a sudden and not going back to sleep? Learn how to stop early mornings and get kids to sleep in.

It’s never easy when your once-good sleeper breaks his streak and starts waking up early.

In the past, my 4 year old would wake up right when I wanted him to, complete with smiles. But at one point, his wake-up time started to get way too early, throwing his schedule completely off.

The worst part was that he was getting up earlier and earlier. Just when I thought 6am was early, he was up at 5:30am, then 5am, and so forth, until I had no idea how much earlier he could wake up.

If you can relate, rest assured that you’re not alone.

And don’t worry. You can have your good sleeper once again, not a tired early-riser who ends up cranky throughout the day. We’ll talk about establishing good habits, however difficult they may be to implement at first. Let’s take a look at how:

Table of Contents

1. Don’t get your child up for the day

Let’s start with the most important rule: don’t get your child up for the day when she wakes up earlier than you want her to.

I know it’s difficult, especially when she won’t stop crying until you relent and get her up. You’re also half asleep and delirious, which means you’re more than willing to do just about anything to get her to stop.

But starting your morning when she cries sends the message that the day begins the minute she wakes up. It denies her the chance to try to fall back asleep or learn how to rest and wait patiently. And your mornings shouldn’t be beholden to when she wakes up, but when the family is ready to start the day.

So, whether you turn the television on for her so you can get enough sleep or head to the kitchen to start breakfast, stop those habits now.

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2. Explain the rules

What can you do to reinforce new habits and make sure your child doesn’t start the day when he wakes up? Explain the rules.

The best time to talk about these early mornings isn’t when he’s awake at 4:30am and you’re sleep-deprived. Instead, talk about it the day before, even during your bedtime routine. Explain the rules when he’s calm and receptive so that any consequences you might enforce won’t come as a surprise.

For instance, a few rules might include:

Staying in the room and only leaving if he has to use the bathroom
Waiting in bed and trying to fall back asleep until you come and get him
Quietly playing with toys in his room

Perhaps most importantly, explain why the rules exist in the first place. You can say that he needs a good night’s sleep to be healthy, or that the family needs to take care of one another and make sure everyone gets the rest they need.

3. Create a conducive sleep environment

Help your child sleep in by making sure she has the right environment to do so. It’s a bit unfair to expect her to sleep in when the sun is shining brightly through the window. Instead, prepare the room so that she’s better able to sleep later.

For instance, use a white noise machine, fan, or heater to muffle sounds that can startle her awake. She might have an easier time staying asleep when the room isn’t so quiet. Hang darkening curtains to block sunlight and keep the room dark.

You can also put a kids’ alarm clock in the room that lights up at a certain time. Let her know that she can get out of the room once the light turns on.

4. Prevent your child from roaming the house

Does your child leave the room and roam the house? Maybe you’ve found him grabbing a snack from the pantry or feeding the hamster with way more than it needed. He might have even turned on the television and parked himself on the couch.

Not only does this disrupt his sleep, but it also poses health and safety issues. Sure, he may have pulled a snack off the pantry, but what if he tries climbing the shelves one day, or gets nipped by the hamster? Without you awake and present to supervise, these can be worrisome situations indeed.

To help him stay in his room, start by explaining the rules as we mentioned. Then, set up barriers to prevent him from getting out.

For instance, do you still have your baby monitor? Place it in his room so that you’re better able to see and hear any movement coming from inside. Hang bells or chimes on the doorknob of his room so that you can get woken up if he happens to open the door.

You can also place a baby gate in certain parts of your home to keep him from moving about. Your potty-trained child would still be able to access the bathrooms and your room, but he wouldn’t be able to climb down the stairs, for instance.

5. Do strategic check-ins

Let’s say the problem isn’t so much that your child leaves the room so much as she cries at the top of her lungs the minute she wakes up. What can you do during those frantic early morning wake-ups?

Do strategic check-ins.

Go to her room when you hear her cry. Let her know that it’s not wake-up time yet and that she should go back to sleep. Close the door and set a timer for 15 minutes. If she’s still crying when the timer goes off, repeat the check-in, letting her know once again that it’s not yet time to wake up and that she should try to sleep.

And make sure to keep these check-ins brief (30 seconds at most), calm, and compassionate. You’re not trying to calm her down to sleep—you’re simply stating the fact that it’s not yet time to wake up.

This lets her know that you’re still here and checking in on her, but that just because she wakes up and cries, doesn’t mean that it’s time to get up.

Repeat these check-ins until it actually is time to wake up for the day. And when you do, reward her with praise for being a trooper and staying in bed (yep, even if she cried most of the time). She was able to overcome a challenge and try something different that she isn’t used to.

6. Use positive reinforcement

I’m a fan of praising behavior we want to see more so than admonishing behavior we don’t. Of course, we have to correct misbehavior, but let’s not forget the power of positive reinforcement. Kids are more likely to continue the behavior we want to promote when we acknowledge the times we see them.

Find anything to praise, however small it might seem. It doesn’t even have to be the ultimate goal of sleeping in until wake-up time. Maybe it’s that your child slept until 5am instead of 4:30am, or that he soothed himself and stopped crying after a while. Look for progress, not perfection.

7. Adjust your expectations

Let me end with one of the most difficult things you might be faced with: adjusting your expectations. For many of us, waking up early has always been a hard ask, especially if we were used to sleeping in. We can’t remember the last time we truly slept in (as in, past 7am) since being a parent.

But what may have been the norm in the past is now vastly different.

Your 4 year old may not be sleeping in until 10am, and we have to accept that that’s normal. She may not even need as much sleep as you expected or hoped, especially when she shows no tiredness the next day.

Preschoolers tend to sleep for 10-12 hours of sleep overnight, and she might be fine with just 10. A bedtime of 7:30pm could very well mean a wake-up time of 5:30am the next morning.

Conclusion

Just when you thought you were done with sleep deprivation, early wake-ups came roaring back. Thankfully, you now have some tips to help your child sleep longer in the mornings.

Don’t get the day started because he’s awake. Instead, establish rules beforehand so he knows when it’s okay to get up or not. Create a conducive sleep environment that can help him stay asleep longer. Prevent him from leaving the room and roaming the house.

If he wakes up in tears, check in at set times so he knows you’re here, but that it’s not time to wake up yet. Praise any progress you see to reinforce the behavior you want to continue. And lastly, adjust your expectations, from the inevitability of early wake-ups to whether he needs 12 hours of sleep after all.

Don’t worry, friend. You can help your good sleeper reclaim his streak and go back to sleeping in—even if “sleeping in” happens at 7am.

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